Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Filtered Resolutions

Every year, you hear the obligatory new year resolutions from people that want to start the year off right. More often than not, I refuse to make a resolution because the few years I have, it lasted about a month. What I usually say is that I'm going to try to be better. A better person, worker, friend, wife, blogger, etc. Just better in general. There is always room to be better and simple decisions can get you there.

Bryan and I have been talking about our life and lifestyle a lot lately. I've deemed 2011 as "My Year." This is my year to get healthy. To lose weight. To stop mindlessly stuffing my face. But I want to go further. I want to make an entire lifestyle change that will live on PAST 2011. I want my husband to think I am cute. And honestly, more importantly, I want to think I am cute.

Lately, I've moaned and complained about taking pictures with my family. I don't want any snapshots of myself. I have little confidence and recently, I've been going so far as to think "Why even do my hair/make-up? What is the point?" Ew. That disgusts me more than this weight gain. Every time I think that I go straight into the bathroom and I do my hair and make-up and I revel in it. I remind myself that I am not defined by my weight or my clothes. My choices define me. The decisions that I make help to define me. I can say, until I am blue in the face, that I want to lose weight. But until I make the decision to go for it, it's all lip-service.

I've mentioned before that I read Young House Love. The other day I was going through some old posts trying to find something and in one post, Sherry writes that in order to keep herself from being paralyzed with indecision in decorating, she just does something. She puts a frame on the wall or just moves an item around. And then she realizes one of two things. Either she likes it, and keeps it. Or she doesn't, and she gets a better idea. Remember how I wrote about my decorating funk? I'm still in it, for the most part. But I am hanging frames anyways. I am decorating my house anyways. And it's working. I'll realize I don't like something and I'll grab it and put it somewhere else. It's slow going, but it's GOING. Which is the point.

This year is brand-spanking new. I can mold my days how I see fit. I can take control of my life instead of just coasting on by. When the hubs and I started talking about this, I thought a lot about it in private. When I would start thing about all the tens of thousands of things I want to change this year (and for the rest of my life) I got really overwhelmed. I kind of suck so, I have a lot to change. Instead of going overboard, I'm going to break it down to simplify it.

Each morning I wake up, and I have a good forty-five minutes of silence. Bryan and I don't talk in the morning. It almost always ends badly. We say good morning, we get ready in silence and we say I love you, bye. That's it. It's rare if we exchange more than a few sentences in the morning. I'm going to start utilizing this time to think about the following:

  • What do I need to accomplish today?
    • Use the KISS! method. Keep it simple, stupid! Only list 5-7 things, depending on how tedious they are. 
  • Put these items in priority order.
    • Example, if one task is "cook dinner", do the dishes first so the kitchen is clean and ready for you.
  • Do them.
    • Find the time to do it. When you get home from work, take a 15 minute breather. Say hi to your pets, change into comfy clothes, drink some water and catch up on your texts. Then? Get busy. Set a time limit or create a pile. (Can't believe I just said that. My sister Alison used to create piles for me on Saturday mornings and I hated them. But if it works for you, do it.)
Every week, I'm going to do a quick side-bar listing what I need to get done by the week. Little projects around the house, chores and other items that are not a 'daily basis' item. 

Every month, when Bryan and I sit down to do our budget, we are going to set a monthly honey-do list. I'll have one and he'll will have one. 

This year, I have already decided to have a few general changes to implement into my life.(You'll see that post tomorrow.)

Here is the key ingredient to my plan. Grace. If I have a terrible day and I listed to scrub the shower and toilet? I'm not going to. I am going to give myself the grace and room to take each day as it comes. When tomorrow arrives, I'll start my list off with whatever few things I didn't do the day before. I am not going to beat myself up about missing a chore. I am going give myself the same courtesy I would want Bryan to give to me. When I have I bad day the last thing I want Bryan to do is knock me down a few more inches. I'm going to encourage myself to read a book or go for a walk to recollect myself. No berating myself!

Small ripples in a big pond? Maybe. But even small ripples can rock a boat. 

Happy 2011!


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