Stop.

My face is washed, I'm sipping on tea, coffee and smoothie stations are set up for easy access tomorrow and my precious boy is screaming his head off.

shepherd selfie - take 1

"Momma!"

"Momma!"

"Dada!"

(Cries)

"Dada!"

We have officially entered the terrible twos. He's refusing meals. He says, "No." and "I don't like it." all the time. Even to pancakes! He loves pancakes. That's how I know we are in a stage. The boy loves him some pancakes. He's not fooling anyone with his "I don't like it."s.

Last night we had class. Luckily it was a topic that I was somewhat familiar with, even though it can be somewhat confusing. As I was listening, I was organizing all my paperwork, punching holes and filing it in a binder. I separated everything by quarter and by topic. I plan to print out the assignments and put what grade I received on it so I can go back and figure out what I missed.

shepherd selfie - take 2

Shepherd is asleep now. Thankfully. I keep reminding myself that this is just a phase. Just a phase. We'll get through it.

The problem is that I don't know how to parent through this. I'm asking other mom friends and I don't know the best way to wade through these waters. The baby phase is fairly easy. Eat Sleep Poop. Boom. Then teething. Yikes. Now the defiance.

You know what else he says? "Stop!" Every time he says it, I wince. He got it from me. You know how kids often say No! No! because they go through a season where parents are always saying No! "No, don't touch that." "No, don't pull the cats tail." Everything is no.

Apparently, I say "stop." and now so does he. I replay it in my head and I hear myself saying it. Stop getting in the cupboards, stop throwing a fit. Stop Shepherd. Stop. Stop.

I'll work on that. Along with everything else.

I feel distant this week from everything. Do you ever have those moments? Where you are just on the peripheral? I feel distant from Bryan, from Shepherd, school, family, friends, work, school. Sometimes I just have these periods of time when I just feel... outside. There are so many things going on and I just feel aloof. I sure hope someone out there has felt the same at times.