Social Media

I'm not sure if I ever mentioned it, but a few weeks ago my friends and I were talking about Facebook and about what happens when we see our Facebook 'friends' in real life.

Before I get into that, I want to mention that all of the people I have on my Facebook I either know in real life or are the writers of blogs that I follow. There is literally no one on my Facebook (besides the blogs/bloggers) that I have not met in person and had some sort of dealing with. It's true. I don't like just adding anyone because some of the things I post I wouldn't post if it was able to be viewed every where. (Like where I am or who I am with or gripes about politics or whatever.) It's my zone and just like Embrace the Crazy, I keep it real. I want to feel comfortable to post what I want without having to worry very much about it.

That said, my friends and I were discussing our friend list clean ups and the times that we have seen our FB friends in real life and what happened. We have each had experiences where someone added us on Facebook, and when we saw them in real life, they either ignored our smiles and/or passing hellos, or they gave us a dirty look or something.

First of all, I was happy that I wasn't alone in having this experience. I've mentioned before how awkward I am with putting myself out there and making friends... When I see someone in Target that I am not particularly close to (but communicate with on Facebook or even Twitter) and I manage to smile and say hi without tripping over my own feet and falling and chipping a tooth or honestly, just choking on fear, it's sort of a big deal. (At least for me it is. I'm one of those shy-sters [get it? Haha!] that hide behind their computer. I'm less awkward that way...) To know that my friends have gone through the same things makes me feel better.

It also astounds me.

The reason that it astounds me is because if a person adds me on Facebook, as sad as it is, they are asking permission to have access to my memories and personal information. It's knowing where I am or where I have been, how I feel about things, good and bad (eek!) pictures of me, what my religion is and where I stand on politics... A friend request, to me, is someone asking me if I would be okay with letting them in. Not just that, but they often have access to my friends because of tagged photos and status streams... They can even see a 'Friendship' between me and one of my friends.

I don't take that lightly. On every single social media outlet that I am a member of, I chose what I want to share and with whom. I talk about some things on Facebook that I don't mention here and I post blogs on here that I don't mention on my Facebook. It is at my discretion. Obviously, my blog is public, while my Facebook account is private. There is a reason for that. Facebook is real time and Embrace the Crazy is a journal for myself. I typically don't write where I've been until after the fact. It's safe. Plus, not many people read this blog outside of my bubble. Which is fine. This blog is not for anyone else. It's just for me. But the things I post on here I post because I don't mind sharing them with whomever decides to stumble upon this ol' blog.

I was explaining to Bryan that while I think using the word snubbed has a connotation to it that doesn't quite articulate my feelings, I suppose its close. I don't expect to be best friends with everyone on my Facebook, and I certainly don't think I have to strike up a conversation with them in public just because we are friends on Facebook. I do feel that if you make eye contact it would not be hard to smile to acknowledge them. Or so say a quick hello before going about your business. Really, I think my expectations are low. A hello has never hurt anyone.

After the few times that I had experienced this, I really started to wonder. If these people want to completely ignore my existence in public, what are their motives to being 'friends' on Facebook? My thoughts barreled down to genuine human curiosity and it's more negative counterpart - nosiness. There is a difference between being intrigued by someone and their life (some reality television/interviews) and general nosiness (like paparazzi fueled websites/magazines). Once I made the distinction, I started thinking about the few people that were anything but friendly in person and I resolved that, based on what I knew of them, they were people that were nosy. So, you know what I did? I deleted them.

At the risk of sounding as though my mindset was "You weren't nice to me in public so I defriended you! Take that!" I'll be honest. I don't want people that are nosy on my Facebook. Which is kind of funny when you think about it. I want people that are genuinely interested in knowing where I've gone in life and sharing funny quips with each other, or giving reviews of items or books or movies. I happen to think that other people are fascinating and I love knowing why people choose certain things or really, just their story in general. But I don't use the information they post against them. I don't ignore them in public or follow them around on Facebook saying rude and mean spirited things. (My husband has a 'friend' that does this on occasion. It's really sad.) And I'm not catty with the information they post. I feel like nosy people only want information to do bad things like gossip and I'm not down with that. So I deleted them and I don't feel bad about it at all.

Moving along, in yesterday's post, I mentioned that I went to dinner with my Mom and Larry on Saturday. While there, I noticed that an ex-boyfriend from my junior year or high school and his friend were there. I debated about interrupting their dinner to say hi. I also didn't want to seem like I just ignored them. I have my ex on my Facebook and we post on each others stuff sometimes - no big deal. But I immediately thought of the conversation I had with my friends.

So, I took all of my 40-pounds-heavier-than-I-was-in-high-school self and walked by their table and said hi, made some small chit-chat and left after a minute or two. It was easy going and not all that awkward.

Then I get to my Mom's and look in a mirror and realize that I forgot that I let my hair air-dry because it was raining and that I chose not to do my make up. I was also wearing slippers and a huge San Francisco sweatshirt. Sigh.

I just HAD to say hello while looking like a homeless person. Ugh.

I Swear

And I don't mean the bad word kind of swear, I mean the swear as in promise, that I am not dead. 

I kind of dropped off the face of the earth blog-o-sphere last week, huh? Honestly, I was super busy on Friday so I wasn't able to get a post up. Then it was the weekend and then it was a holiday and as usual, I don't post on those days. Here I am again though, it's Tuesday, and it's a four day week! 

Can I get a collective woohoo?

I had a fabulous weekend. Seriously. Let's rewind to Friday so I can spill all of my super amazing happenings in order. 

So, for the past few weeks I have been planning a surprise party for my hub's 25th birthday! He showed up to his standing Friday night gig at Harris Ranch and was greeted by thirty of our family and friends, a huge cake and best of all, a night OFF! We got to eat and drink and be merry. It was a hoot. Yes. I just said hoot. I know that proves that I am an 80 year old woman. I embrace it. 

Saturday, Bryan and I managed to straighten up the house and get some hang out time in before he had to take off for his gig... and I had no plans. Much to Denise's dismay, I was not in the mood to accompany her to a local wine bar to see the band Poor Man's Poison. There were two reasons why I didn't want to go. 

1. I was not in the mood to be in a teeny, tiny wine bar with a bazillion other people to pay $9 for a glass of wine when a bottle would cost me $11 (tax included) and probably not have a place to sit. 

2. I was still a bit butt-hurt because I had contacted Poor Man's Poison about coming out to Harris Ranch to play for Bryan's birthday and the message I received back was kind of wish-washy and gave no real reason to say 'no' and the reply didn't actually say no. They just said that they would 'talk to the guys and get back to you' and they never got back to me. Which is poor form, friends. It's fine if, as a band, you don't do birthday parties or any private gigs, I get that. But you should be able to stand behind that and just give a "would love to help you out but it's not gonna happen" for sure message. Not a 'we scare easy when it comes to private parties and weddings...but I'll ask the guys and get back to you' message. 

But it's all good. I was bummed that I couldn't make it happen cause I knew that it would just blow Bryan's brain and I tend to go all baby-of-the-family when something I get excited about doesn't pan out. I still love them. Their first CD makes life at work happier. Love it. Bryan has yet to hand over their second CD for me to burn onto my computer at work. Hoarder. 

All that to say I was not in the mood to go. It happens. Instead, I had the pleasure of hanging out with my Mom and Larry. We went to dinner and we watched Conviction which is based on a true story and we loved it! It was a really good time... very low key. 

On Sunday, Bryan and I decided to sleep in and take the day off from church. I really wanted to take a drive to the mountains or to the coast but when I looked at my Facebook, I saw a ton of status updates from friends saying they were at the coast. Uhh...I want to go to the coast to get away from Hanford, not follow it to a tiny coastal town. Bryan wasn't feeling it either so we grabbed breakfast with Kari, Adam and little Owen. Who slept the entire time. Even when the waiter kicked his carriage twice. I could have socked that dude. 

The rest of Sunday we kind of just hung out at home before we went to rent two red box movies, Toy Story 3 and How To Train Your Dragon. We ended up playing a few games online and only had time for one movie, so we watched Toy Story 3. Ahhh. I loved it. Even the scary clown called Chuckles. I made Bryan hold my hand the entire time he was on the screen though. I hate clowns. HATE THEM.

I got all choked up at the end but I made sure to play it off. I know the teasing from Bryan would be endless! I'm such a girl. 

On Monday, we woke up and got ready. I was starting to get really hungry and then I started getting a headache. We ate and my headache didn't go away. I took some medicine and laid down on the couch and we watched How To Train Your Dragon. I loved it! And by the end? I was feeling a whole lot better. So good, that we went for quick bike ride and then we played another game on the computer. I needed to grocery shop for this week, so we ran to Save Mart, ate some dinner, and went to the gym. 

It was a pretty standard weekend but I loved it. Bryan and I didn't start bickering from all the time we spent with each other... well, I did get a little hungry-bearish yesterday. I get a little mean when I am hungry. Food = Happiness and no migraines! 

I feel well rested and I had such a good time hanging out with Bryan.

Tonight I'm making porcupine meatballs and we are going back to the gym. I want my face back! Seriously. home needs to lose weight and fast! 

Don't Expect Much/Weekly Goals

*Hey ya'll. I forgot to publish this to post this morning, so I jumped on to publish it on my lunch. :) Sorry for the delay. Yes, I am fully aware that you probably don't schedule your mornings around my posts, but I still try to stay consistent. 

This weekend was pretty low-key at our house. I went to a movie, No Strings Attached, with Denise, her cousin and Anna. It was a pretty good movie. I started getting a really bad migraine during the movie and ended up having to take my strong headache medicine.

On Saturday I went to my mom's house in the morning to hang out and we ended up hanging out all day! Bryan's company moved into a new building and we ended up going to the grand opening, and I won a digital picture frame! I was the first number called and I couldn't believe it! I never win anything! I'll post about it once I set it up. :)

After, we hit up Michael's and I scored a bunch of loot - but that's a post for tomorrow. We met up with her husband, Larry for dinner and it was a blast. Towards the end of dinner I started having a really weird feeling. I had made plans to go to a local wine bar after dinner but I was really bumming, hard. I don't know if it was the onset of a headache I had later that night or what. But I ended up going home and slumming it on the couch. 

On Sunday, I opted to stay home from church because of my mood and later in the afternoon, Bryan and I went to Visalia to run some errands. Which turned out to be a long and not so fabulous time. I was so discouraged on the way home and I was talking whining to Bryan so when we got home, he helped me clean up our room, do more laundry AND he cleaned up the kitchen. 

I love that man. 

On another note, I'm deciding to do the weekly goals early even though I wrote the post so late last week. 

Here is what I was supposed to get done: 

Week of January 16, 2011

-Continue Laundering

-Clean and decorate master bedroom

-Look at paint inspiration for the master bedroom

-Look at light fixtures for my entryway

-Unpack five boxes from the garage

And here is what I did:

Week of January 16, 2011

-Continue Laundering

-Clean and decorate master bedroom

-Look at paint inspiration for the master bedroom

-Look at light fixtures for my entryway

-Unpack five boxes from the garage

-Continue Laundering

SO CLOSE! Bryan and I have maybe four loads of laundry until we are completely -done- with it all! YAY. The end is near!

-Clean and decorate master bedroom 

Like I said, last night we did manage to clean the heck out of our master bedroom, but there wasn't time to decorate. Wait, does putting one of these in the room count? 

Image: Partylite

I think it should. 

-Look at paint inspiration for master bedroom.

Post coming soon. But I did look around and I am clueless. 

-Look at light fixtures for my entryway.

I haven't found 'the one' yet, but I'm still hunting! Didn't catch the first post? Click here.

-Unpack 5 boxes. 

FAIL. That's really all I gotta say about that. 

As you can see, I am getting progressively better. I WILL toot my own horn by saying that last night, I also went into the Beach Room and tidied up a bit (finally). :) I will also say that I'm a cheater because that is one of things on this weeks list! 

Week of January 24, 2011

-Continue Laundering

-Unpack 5 boxes

-Tidy the beach room

-Finish decorating the master bedroom

-Organize Items for Yard Sale

Here's hoping that I can do as well as I did last week!

Filtered Resolutions

Every year, you hear the obligatory new year resolutions from people that want to start the year off right. More often than not, I refuse to make a resolution because the few years I have, it lasted about a month. What I usually say is that I'm going to try to be better. A better person, worker, friend, wife, blogger, etc. Just better in general. There is always room to be better and simple decisions can get you there.

Bryan and I have been talking about our life and lifestyle a lot lately. I've deemed 2011 as "My Year." This is my year to get healthy. To lose weight. To stop mindlessly stuffing my face. But I want to go further. I want to make an entire lifestyle change that will live on PAST 2011. I want my husband to think I am cute. And honestly, more importantly, I want to think I am cute.

Lately, I've moaned and complained about taking pictures with my family. I don't want any snapshots of myself. I have little confidence and recently, I've been going so far as to think "Why even do my hair/make-up? What is the point?" Ew. That disgusts me more than this weight gain. Every time I think that I go straight into the bathroom and I do my hair and make-up and I revel in it. I remind myself that I am not defined by my weight or my clothes. My choices define me. The decisions that I make help to define me. I can say, until I am blue in the face, that I want to lose weight. But until I make the decision to go for it, it's all lip-service.

I've mentioned before that I read Young House Love. The other day I was going through some old posts trying to find something and in one post, Sherry writes that in order to keep herself from being paralyzed with indecision in decorating, she just does something. She puts a frame on the wall or just moves an item around. And then she realizes one of two things. Either she likes it, and keeps it. Or she doesn't, and she gets a better idea. Remember how I wrote about my decorating funk? I'm still in it, for the most part. But I am hanging frames anyways. I am decorating my house anyways. And it's working. I'll realize I don't like something and I'll grab it and put it somewhere else. It's slow going, but it's GOING. Which is the point.

This year is brand-spanking new. I can mold my days how I see fit. I can take control of my life instead of just coasting on by. When the hubs and I started talking about this, I thought a lot about it in private. When I would start thing about all the tens of thousands of things I want to change this year (and for the rest of my life) I got really overwhelmed. I kind of suck so, I have a lot to change. Instead of going overboard, I'm going to break it down to simplify it.

Each morning I wake up, and I have a good forty-five minutes of silence. Bryan and I don't talk in the morning. It almost always ends badly. We say good morning, we get ready in silence and we say I love you, bye. That's it. It's rare if we exchange more than a few sentences in the morning. I'm going to start utilizing this time to think about the following:

• What do I need to accomplish today?
• Use the KISS! method. Keep it simple, stupid! Only list 5-7 things, depending on how tedious they are. 
• Put these items in priority order.
• Example, if one task is "cook dinner", do the dishes first so the kitchen is clean and ready for you.
• Do them.
• Find the time to do it. When you get home from work, take a 15 minute breather. Say hi to your pets, change into comfy clothes, drink some water and catch up on your texts. Then? Get busy. Set a time limit or create a pile. (Can't believe I just said that. My sister Alison used to create piles for me on Saturday mornings and I hated them. But if it works for you, do it.)

Every week, I'm going to do a quick side-bar listing what I need to get done by the week. Little projects around the house, chores and other items that are not a 'daily basis' item. 

Every month, when Bryan and I sit down to do our budget, we are going to set a monthly honey-do list. I'll have one and he'll will have one. 

This year, I have already decided to have a few general changes to implement into my life.(You'll see that post tomorrow.)

Here is the key ingredient to my plan. Grace. If I have a terrible day and I listed to scrub the shower and toilet? I'm not going to. I am going to give myself the grace and room to take each day as it comes. When tomorrow arrives, I'll start my list off with whatever few things I didn't do the day before. I am not going to beat myself up about missing a chore. I am going give myself the same courtesy I would want Bryan to give to me. When I have I bad day the last thing I want Bryan to do is knock me down a few more inches. I'm going to encourage myself to read a book or go for a walk to recollect myself. No berating myself!

Small ripples in a big pond? Maybe. But even small ripples can rock a boat. 

Happy 2011!

Fun Times at the Zoo

I would like to start off this blog by saying that July was one of the WORST months for me. It is a true saying when people reference, "when it rains, it pours." I can't believe the goings on of this past month and I am also saddened by the fact that July seems to be seeping into August.

The past month at work has been really difficult. Unfortunately, I can't go into much detail because things aren't resolved and maybe won't ever be. But if you could take a moment to pray for me and the people at work involved with the situation, I would greatly appreciate it.

Anywho, every summer I take a few days off to have a 'vacation' and this year I decided to escape to my sister house. Alison and Mark welcomed me in to their home for 4 whole days and I love spending time with them.

While we hung out and went to Coronado beach which is my FAVORITE beach, the biggest adventure that we had was going to the San Diego Zoo, a place that I had not been for quite some time. Actually, it had been over ten years ago that my Mom and Dad trekked our whole family to visit my Dad's cousin Dorothy who lives in San Diego.

The reason why I wanted to go so badly was because they just opened up the Elephant Odyssey and if you know anything about me you KNOW that I love elephants. Like... some people collect china plates with cat's on them. Some people collect beanie babies... I collect elephants. That's what I do.

Before I get to the pictures that I know you so desperately want to see, I needed to tell you a story and I wish above all other wishes (at the moment) that I had taken pictures. After we left the Elephant Odyssey portion of the zoo we went to see the lions (which is one of Alisons' favorite parts) as we were standing there, looking at the regal animals, Alison points out a sign. The sign warns that we are in a danger zone of BEING SPRAYED and we should keep back 9 feet. Seriously? How many people were at the zoo staring at the awesome power of the lions and then the lion lifted its leg and SPRAYED all over them?

That would be a good story though... to an extent. Maybe not for the person that was sprayed but for the person that is hearing the spraying story. Like... If Denise came to me and told me that she visited the zoo and was sprayed by the lions I would DIE laughing. Literally. And when I got to the pearly gates and Jesus came to see me, I would STILL be laughing. And because God created laughter and humor I think he would laugh a little too. But that's just me.

On to the pictures:

(Alison and I waiting in line so that she could purchase her season pass... I say to this picture, "Hello, Megans' Squished Nose.")

(The cutest Koala... possibly ever.)

(A leopard that was being walked around the park.)

(Me... standing in front of the elephants butts. :) )

(I could hardly contain my excitement.. They are so massive and awesome!)

( The only way this picture would be better is if the elephant was REAL!)

(Oh wait... I guess there is another way for the picture to be better, add Alison and viola!)

(My loves! They were so good all day... Emma loves the zoo! )

A Good and Unproductive Weekend.

I am completely and utterly in love... With my house. I love the smell, the sounds, how it settles at night. I walked out this morning and stood the porch and just looked. I stretched. I seriously cannot wait to get a little bench so I can take my coffee out there in the mornings and just relax.

Last night I had the privilege of hanging out with Tanner Mathews, my best friend in high school. We were inseparable our senior year. One thing is true, I absolutely adore that boy. He is amazing. I was laughing my butt off ALL night. He's a riot.

He came over around 6, and we went to watch Push. (Click here for the review.)

Then we went to La Fiesta to grab some food and a beer. It was delicious. My new guilty pleasure is a number 13, (Enchilada and Taco) with a Bud Light Lime. By the time we got there, it was like 9:15 and we start to walk up to the bar door. As soon as I reach out for it, the mariachi band start to play. It was the long drawl of the trumpet. The trumpet that has no filter, so it is very, very loud. I turn to look at Tanner and he looks at me and says, "Oh, hell no, Megan." I start laughing so hard. The look on his face was precious! Needless to say, we went into another room. OMG. It was amazing. Good movie, good food, good company equals a perfect evening in my book!

Today I have managed to get absolutely nothing done. Which is both awesome and embarrassing. There is so much to be done in this house! Boxes and cleaning, cleaning and boxes. But no. I chatted online with Michael all day, playing poker and webcaming. Then, out of no where, I fall asleep. I got off the internet to take a shower, and I just laid on my bed for a while, and then all of a sudden I wake up and an hour or so has passed by. It was crazy. Well that nap made me more lazy, so got back onto the internet and chatted away.

I talked to Brad on Facebook for a while, he invited me to his casa tomorrow. Him and Elaine have a couple of horses and after verbally abusing me for being such a loser because I was at home alone on a Saturday, he said that I should come over after church tomorrow to ride one of their horses, Chief. It is amazing how excited I am about this! I haven't been on a horse since I was like 7 or 8, when my Grandpa took us around the dairy on Lady. Sooo, I'm stoked. Hopefully the weather is good and he really texts me. He said he'd take pictures to which I replied, "Oh, that'll be great. So that when I fall off the horse you'll have photographic evidence. AWESOME." But nonetheless, if there are pictures I will post them for your viewing pleasures.

Mmm, the house smells so amazing right now. After my long, hot shower, I felt the need to bake. So I made a peanut butter bars with chocolate on top, and while that was in the oven I made a few chocolate covered pretzels. :) So now, the house smells like a home.

The good part is that I don't actually feel like eating anything that I baked. So maybe I'll cut them up and take them to church tomorrow! We'll just have to see! Makes me kind of nervous because you never know if someone is allergic to peanut butter.

Alright, well. Time to brush the teeth and get the animals settled for bed.