Friday, March 18, 2011


I feel like it's more often than not that I assure my readers (aka: my mom and sister) that I am not yet dead. However, they already are aware of this so I'll skip it.

Where have I been?

Inspirationless. Is that a word? I don't think so. I went through that bout of depression that I have blogged about and while the fog is lifting I haven't gotten any type of drive back. No fire. My bum is fireless.

I am, however, at a point where I don't want to spend money. I don't want to shop for clothes, I don't want to shop for food, I don't want to buy household items, I don't want to decorate. All of that is good for the bank account. Except for the food part, because when you don't buy groceries, you don't make things. When you don't make things, you buy town food.

When we were little, we rarely ate fast food. I remember when McDonald's had their Wednesday night $.59 hamburgers, we'd get them and they were the best. ever. If we would get Taco Bell on a Friday night before watching TGIF, we were allowed one "special item" and a regular taco.  Or we would just get the ten pack of tacos and each of us would get two. Oh! When we would go to Tulare, sometimes my Mom would let us stop for french fries and a drink. It was the best treat. My point, is that we rarely ate this type of food and when we did it was called town food. People make fun of me to this day because I still call it town food. It is food - from town. Hence, town food.

End of random tangent.

When you buy town food... you get fat.

Good news is that I have lost weight! Probably because I was deathly ill and missed an almost full week of work. That contributes to why I haven't blogged. But I'm not going to lie, I'm pretty positive that even if I HAD been healthy... I wouldn't have blogged.

I have to put living my life first, because if I don't, what will have to write on here?

I am most certainly not witty enough to carry this blog without real life substance behind it. I'm okay with being honest about that. Sometimes, I won't be blogging because I will be living... and then after I've had enough living, I'll blog. And I have to let myself be okay with that. It's hard though because I feel guilty.

Not because I think that any one actually reads my little slice of the interweb, but because I know how important it is for me to write.

Dumb. It's all dumb. The feelings I have about this blog are not rational. It is what it is and I'll write when I write. If there is anyone out there, other than my family, thanks for sticking with me....


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